Oh, Johnny was a tall man but his memory was short
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He'd forget to duck at doorways and often he'd get hurt
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I took good care of him for he had no family
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Actually he did, but he forgot who they be
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Johnny often liked to go out on the town
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He'd forget where he'd be going so he'd just wander around
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I knew when he was back for I would hear the smack
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Of his head hitting the doorway but tonight it was alack
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Johnny came home headless, it was a great disgrace
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But wherever it's a-lying there's a smile upon his face
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I should have seen it coming, he finally lost his mind
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But if his head don't turn up soon then all his hats are mine
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Johnny came towards me but suddenly he stopped
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As if trying to think of something but having no luck
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Still he didn't notice that his head weren't there
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'Til he took out a brush and tried to comb his hair
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I said, "Johnny where's your cranium?" but he didn't seem to know
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He just shrugged his shoulders and tried to find his nose
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And the sight of him there topless made me start to cry
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For I feared we'd ne'er again see eye to eye
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Johnny came home headless, it was a great disgrace
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But wherever it's a-lying there's a smile upon his face
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I should have seen it coming, he should have stayed in bed
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For now I fear he'll spend his life just trying to get ahead
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Refusing to believe that he had split for good
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His lower half and me searched the neighbourhood
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It soon became apparent that his head we wouldn't find it
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He could not retrace his steps, he was absent minded
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Well years went by til late one night I heard a voice I swore
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Was Johnny calling out to me, I flung open the door
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Johnny's head was home, it took a taxi cab
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Alas, it was too late, his body had gone bad
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Johnny's head was homeless, his body was cremated
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And the funeral was harder than he had anticipated
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I should of seen it coming he said in his eulogy
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But never thought I'd have to say I ain't got no-body
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(I ain't got nobody)
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Johnny came home headless, it was a great disgrace
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But now his head's upon a shelf, a smile upon his face
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But now his head's upon a shelf, a smile upon his face
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Johnny Came Home Headless
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The Arrogant Worms |