When you called me a useless druggie
|
At least you got half of it right
|
When you called me a hopeless alcoholic
|
I'm only hopeless after nine at night
|
And when you said I came staggering home blind drunk
|
If I didn't you'd get terrible fright
|
And if this is the land of hope and glory
|
Where's the land of hope but not quite
|
|
I've been scruff bag, dirt bag, always someones binbag
|
But never been bono or sting
|
However I dressed never really impressed
|
So they never got to hear a damn thing
|
I've been bad man sad man certified mad
|
But never 007 or saint
|
Trendsetter, go getter, international jet setter
|
Are just a few things that I ain't
|
Trendsetter, go getter, internation jet setter
|
Are just a few thins I ain't
|
|
The time you told class I was a half wit
|
Was my very first 50 %
|
Previous best in any other test
|
Was either stolen copied or lent
|
And when you branded me and every single one of my mates
|
A waste of time and effort to teach
|
Why d'you give us sums if our only hope was bums
|
On someone else's deckchair and beach
|
|
I've been smart arse, mardy arse, on and off a lard arse
|
But never been a legend to god
|
New thing dumb thing even last year's thing
|
Headbang? - not even a nod!
|
I've been left-wing, secure-wing, lost stripes, gained winged
|
We've never caused a lady to faint
|
Wideboy, ladyboy, read it in the paper boy
|
A few things they said that I ain't
|
Wideboy, ladyboy, read it in the paper boy
|
A few things they said that I ain't
|
|
When popularity soared, hometown and abroad
|
I spent most of it trying to breathe in
|
Always ill at ease, too willing to please
|
An inferior life's bargain bin
|
When you come from a background of bargain bins
|
You're bound to fear it ends where it begins
|
So when nation adored we felt more of a fraud
|
And too phoney to celebrate wins
|
|
I've been scruffbag, dirtbag, always someones binbag
|
But never been Bono or Sting
|
However I dressed never really impressed
|
So they never got to hear a damn thing
|
I've been badman, sadman, certified mad
|
But never 007 or Saint
|
Trend-setter, go-getter, international jet-setter
|
Are just a few things that I ain't
|
Trend-setter, go-getter, international jet-setter
|
Are just a few things that I ain't
|
|
-----------------
|
Just A Few Things That I Ain't
|
| The Beautiful South |
