It was a fine left coast morning
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And I found myself planted outside
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The Cap 'N' Cork
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Tipping back the hops
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In order to calm my dancing hands
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You see I usually don't play
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The tied-up watchdog routine
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Looking up and down the street
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But this is the corner
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Joey A., my car and I
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Were supposed to meet
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You see Joey The Amateur and I
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Were out clinkin' glasses last night
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When I got three sheets to an ill wind
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Myself being in possession
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Of a fine Double 5 Lincoln convert
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Joey offered to skip me back to the crib
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I awoke to a barren driveway
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And a neighbor started to chide
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"Joey dumped you off,
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And he's got your ride!"
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Black cats, they don't bother me
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I smile in bad company
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And I'm cool as the day is long
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But takin' my car, daddy
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That's dead wrong
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It was now 11:22
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And up scuffles Benny The Shoe
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A real hot air merchant from way back
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I inquired about Joey A.
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And my superfine Lincoln
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Then Mr. B.S. beat his gums
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And testified to me,
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"Joe's washing the short,
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Changing da oil
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He'll be here by three."
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So the little hand hits three
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And who should appear
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But a Cuban cat named Geronimo
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An upstanding cat
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In the textile business
|
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He said, "Joey knocked over a racketman
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And is laying low for a few,
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But in your trunk he left you some treasure
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A pint of rye and a case of Slim Jim's
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For your masticating pleasure
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Now ten p.m. finds me
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Hot as a hophead's zippo
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When Rosie appears
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On her financially motivated
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Nightly exercise routine
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I asked the whereabouts
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Of the horsepower thief in question
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And she shot me that amphetamine stare
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And said, "Joey A.?
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I just got out of his Lincoln
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On Hollywood Way."
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I thought
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"Kill Joey A.!" when the bar keep came out
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To simmer my slow boil
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He said, "Joey A. just called on the blower,
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He said you better skip town,
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'Cause the cops got your ride.
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You're wanted for solicitation,
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Possession -- you owe him one,
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And here's the scather." He said,
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"And another thing cat,
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Don't ask me for
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Goddamn favors!"
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-----------------
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Friday the 13th
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Royal Crown Revue |