There won't be any presents this Christmas
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No goodies in your stocking
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The milk and cookies that the children left out
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Will be left untouched beside the sink
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The reindeer will be staying in their pens this year
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The elves haven't built any thing
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'Cause Santa got arrested
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Last Christmas Day
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Police got calls on 911
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About a red-suited man who weighed a ton
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There was a clear trail of evidence pointing north
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This was the seventh time it happened on December 24th
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The Mounties reached the North Pole
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They found it was outside their jurisdiction
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They called up Interpol, the Finnish police
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To facilitate the suspect's extradition
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They knocked on the door of a well-marked shop
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With a warrant for the owner's apprehension
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Then Santa got arrested
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Christmas Day
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Santa was charged with B&E
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His council advised he plead guilty
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There was footage of the crime running on TV
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And photographs of little children sitting on his knee
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The judge expressed concern about the risk of recidivism
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His sentence was commuted
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He got a bond of nonassociation with the elves
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And his reindeer licence was suspended
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He says he's giving up all of his former life
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And now he wants to be a dental assistant
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'Cause Santa got arrested
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Santa got arrested
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Santa got arrested
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Last Christmas Day
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-----------------
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Santa Got Arrested
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The Arrogant Worms |