Big up to anyone who's been involved in care & community
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'Cos it's the GLC back again
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With another rave anthem for you to feast on, ya bastards
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I nick stereos, videos and TVs
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But when I'm feeling nice I helps cats out of trees
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I'm really nice but you don't know that
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Because I'll beat you up, cos you look like a tw@t
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Nicked a car in the day, driving real fast
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Went out to Risca for a quick fcuking blast
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When I've finished my run, it's back home for buns
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With my mum and her mates, watching re-runs
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By day I sells draw with my mates you see
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But at night I likes to watch romantic comedy
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I likes to watch Friends and Cheers and Frasier
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But during the day I might cut you with a razor
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You know I likes hip-hop, you know there's no stopping
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But I gotta go, to take my nan out shopping
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During the day, I gotta clean the house
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But you knows I can sort you out with an ounce
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If you see me in town, it's drug money I'm exchanging
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But when I'm at home, I'm mainly flower arranging
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I likes the yellow daisies and the red roses too
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But when I've finished that, it's back to sniffing glue
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I watch TV in bed, it really is perfection
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Then I w@nks over my stamp collection
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'Cos that's what I does when I gets home
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'Cos the Queen's fcuking head gives me a big fcuking bone
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You might be hard, even harder than me
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But I bet you can't look after a fcuking Bonsai tree
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Had a fight with some kids, and we kicked their as$
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Then I took my kid sister to a ballet class
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Every beating I does
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No matter how hard it is, no matter how many people I wreck up
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I always cleans up the blood off my hands and trackie afterwards, innit
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Here we go, Benny Blanco
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I lives up my nan's, I told you all before
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She's not very rich, in fact she's fcuking poor
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Not 'cos she blew it on fags and a blow
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But she's addicted to fcuking Bingo
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I takes her there every Tuesday night
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Then it's off to Voodoo's for a fight
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I picks her up around half-past four
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And then we goes home and smokes a draw
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My nan's wicked, she likes toking blow
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Sometimes we watches the Antiques Roadshow
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I nick stereos, videos and TVs
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But that's what you do when you're in the GLC
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During the day I do the shopping for my mum down at Spar
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Just so I can borrow my dad's fcuking car
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When I goes out, I does a Ritzy's run
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And when I gets home, I cutches my mum
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Sometimes I go shopping in Matalan's
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If the day's nice, I'll take both my nan's
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I push 'em round in a wonky old trolley
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Then I start to hit 'em with a brolly
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'Cos you see I'm not nice all the time
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But when I smokes a mix I feels quite fine
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On Saturday night I goes fighting in Cwmbran
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Then on Sundays I help my mum make some jam
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At 6, I goes out for a drink and a fag
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By 8, I'm horned-up and I'm up for a shag
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By 10, I'm wrecked up and I pukes on my jeans
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At 12, I goes home to use the washing machine
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Yeah you knows it, it's the fcuking GLC,
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Benny Blanco, fcuking Adam Hussein, you knows it,
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Fcuking Mike Balls, Raphael, innit
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I nick stereos, videos and TVs
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My name is Mike Balls and I'm like a disease
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I'll fcuk up your insides and bring you down to your knees
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But when I threaten you with violence, I say thank you and please
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Who's that man in the window pane
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He's looking really fcuking crazy, I think it's Adam Hussein
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He beat up loads of kids on their way home last night,
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Cooked up some dinner and was really alright
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I think he's not bad in his own kind of way
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But if he doesn't like your face he'll beat you up 'cos you're gay
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I nick stereos, videos and TVs
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I love being a Clart, it's great to be me
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Get with us, be one of the GLC
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'Cos you knows it's us that you wanna be
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Our crew is growing nearly every fcuking day
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So get with us and don't be a fcuking gay
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I stack shelves at night, help my gran pay the bills
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But I gotta make sure that she takes the right pills
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Myra Hindley and Ian Brady,
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those two have got nothing on my old lady
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She's quite hard and she'll kick me in
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So I've gotta clean up the rubbish and put out the bin
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I got caught with the drugs, so now I'm in rehab |