If I go to Heaven it'll probably be a slum
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And all the pretty angels just might be packing guns
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And if I see St. Peter will he hit me up for cash
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Will I find the road to Jesus or just lose him in the trash
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The Shaggs were right
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You're never going to please anybody
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Not in this world
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If I go to Hell I might find it very dull
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Like an Amway convention or an endless shopping mall
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When all the innocent demons want to poke me with a fork
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Or just put me in a taxi and send me to New York
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Scientists proved it years ago
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The Shaggs were much better than the Beatles
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Maybe I'll return as an iguana
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And lie upon a beach down in the Bahamas
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Although ignored in their day
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The Shaggs are now recognised as the geniuses they were
|
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I just wanna know what happens when you die
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Do you walk down in a hole or float up to the sky
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Is it just a waste of water, when your widow cries?
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Oh don't tell me you've never heard of the Shaggs?
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If the atheists are right then I have no need to worry
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For there is no great being whose favour I must curry
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And I'll be going nowhere once they lay me in the earth
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So why waste a Sunday by going to church?
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If you really wanted to
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You could run out right now and buy a Shaggs record
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If the atheists are wrong then I've got a bill that's due
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So should I be a Christian or a Moslem or a Jew
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Should I spend all day just praying on my knees
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And searching through the world for a deity to please
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A Shaggs record would be a sound investment
|
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If the atheists are right then I have no need to worry
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For there is no great being whose favour I must curry
|
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The fat peoples want what the skinny peoples got
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The skinny peoples want what the fat peoples got
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But all I've ever wanted is what the Shaggs got
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Dat Ding(?) and my pal, Foot Foot
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-----------------
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When I Get To Heaven
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The Dead Milkmen |