You can't rap, my friend, you're white and you're from Fulham
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Please put down the mic, there's no way you can fool them
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Don't be stupid, you won't get that far
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Turn your back on Hip Hop, bro, and go and play guitar
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Of all the possibilities I ever coulda chosen
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Supposing career wise I'd picked Hip Hop
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Imagine all the tip top rapper's bottom lips drop
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Sitting there shocked that some other bloody shit hot
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Dude with a mullet, bussin shorts, wearing flip flops
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Is spitting to a gathering looking like a criss cross
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Of fans loving Prodigy, Kylie and Slipknot
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Nearly coulda happened bro, look at me, I shit not
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Little Elliot rhymes for the hell of it
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If only he was ghetto mans, maybe we would sell a bit
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I tried hard to dig up the credentials
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Even thought about putting gold in my dentals
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An Anglo Saxon with a broken accent
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But rappers from Fulham get a strange reaction
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I said bye to Rap, saw the issue at hand
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Some guitar lessons later, formed my own band
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You can't rap, my friend, you're white and you're from Fulham
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Please put down the mic, there's no way you can fool them
|
Don't be stupid, you won't get that far
|
Turn your back on Hip Hop, bro, and go and play guitar
|
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Attention seeking, how far should a man go?
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Cut his ear off like Vincent Van Gogh
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Dash cash to the crowd so the venue scrambles
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Turn my good life into a baby shambles
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Fuck myself up real properly like Pete Doherty
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Cover of heat, I'm hot property
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Everybody's clocking me, I own the crowd
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Then I gotta link me up with a girls aloud
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Next, exchange vows now my pop's is proud
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There's a nine on my cloud, I'm as pleased as I ever been, bro
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Mans flash like Jose Mourinho
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Women crave me like bottles of pinot
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Now I've got big I can fight photographers
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Bang the obvious, please biographers
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Spend currency 'til there ain't none left
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And when I need more I'll fake my own death
|
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You can't rap, my friend, you're white and you're from Fulham
|
Please put down the mic, there's no way you can fool them
|
Don't be stupid, you won't get that far
|
Turn your back on Hip Hop, bro, and go and play guitar
|
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Right now it's just hit and miss, soon I'll taste a bit of bliss
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Banging chicks at worst with looks like Jayne Middlemiss
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Never doing hideous, it's too bad for business
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I spin when they grin with skin like Darth Sidious
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Never out-riddle this, all chattin' gibberish
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Verbal diarrhea so you're never getting rid of this
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I hear your retorts, there's all sorts like liquorice
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I can sense your bitterness, you wishing you written this
|
|
You can't rap, my friend, you're white and you're from Fulham
|
Please put down the mic, there's no way you can fool them
|
Don't be stupid, you won't get that far
|
Turn your back on Hip Hop, bro, and go and play guitar
|
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-----------------
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You Can't Rap
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Example |