I'm here on a mission to tell you exactly what can go wrong if you're not careful. You see, it's like this: you're running down the staircase at random. You take one step, you take two steps, you take seven steps, 10 steps, two steps, 15 steps, 19 steps...you're lying in a heap at the bottom of the staircase--blood, bones, powder, that sort of thing--and you're wondering, how did I get here? And then you look up and you see...it's a man in a cowl, it's a man in a cowl, he opens his face to you--it's Jimmy Tarbuck*. He is saying, "Kiss the ring! Kiss the ring!", and he says, "Yes, there is a Santa Claus, and anybody who blasphemes against Santa or any of his helpers shall die." What do you do? What do YOU do?
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You whimper thanks to the heavenly sky
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Its grey is getting lighter
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No peace of mind or sleep for you
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You haven't earned it yet
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and you won't by dusk, I bet
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Until you learn what futures you've destroyed
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we musn't see you sulk or get annoyed...no
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On the day I lost everything they couldn't help enough
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They shot my veins full of gelatine
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I said, "Thank you very much, you're too kind!"
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While they lived in luxury
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I made do with money, sweet money
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and now I'm going to measure the rain
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and you can sit and watch me--Look! Look!
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Don't even think about not answering your phone
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It might be me and I know you're always home
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On the day I lost everything they couldn't help enough
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They stopped my clock and they folded my wings
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I said, "Thank you very much for everything!"
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It means, "I'm gonna destroy you with my slings and my bullets!"
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On the day I lost everything the sky was purest white
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and the clocks had stopped so I started to sing
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"The Magpie Sleeps Tonight"
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On the day I lost everything
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* A veteran Liverpool comedian, talk show and game show host, and a golfing enthusiast as well.
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The Day I Lost Everything
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The Fatima Mansions |