This one goes out to
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All the cuties in the quad
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Walking kitty corner
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With the itty bitty bod
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Telescopin' out the window
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Waxin' wise, while you walk
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I stalk the fox box
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To the party on lock
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Security check
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Soon my ID's inspected
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In the elevator
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Waiting to get wreck-ed
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Open the door
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Then get floored by the heat
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You get passed a "J"
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While they play Paul's Boutique
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Get a plastic cup and ice
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Unless you like it neat
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All the girl's stand up
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All the guys take seats
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Smoke fills the air
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You fill in Denise
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On your major, on your minor
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On the Middle East-a for sheeza
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High plains drifter
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This sorority sister
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Let the belt loop lead you
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To the liquor elixirs
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Smellin better than a bubble gum
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Scratch and sniff sticker
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We lick, shoot suck
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Then duck out even quicker
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Mad dash to my crib
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'Cause my roomie is a geek
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He's playing galaxies
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Makin' friends on Dantooine
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So, I'm climbing up a tree
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Beers clinging to my teeth
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Miss the window ledge, hit the hedge
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Land upon my keys. (Oh!)
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(chrous)x2
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(I am a dorm rat
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That is the fact, Jack
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Lookin' at insects
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Playin with warm wax
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Hittin on the honeys
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At the vending machine
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A one hitters, trade dinner
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All you need's an ID)
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Plaid pajama bottoms
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Or plaid pleated skirts
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Everything you girl's wear
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Makes me stare at the dirt
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If I had balls I'd flirt
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With y'all in study hall
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Do the geek talk 'til your
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Eyes roll back into your skull
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But I'm a FR33K
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Spelled F-R-double Three-K
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When you're walkin' my way
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With my pockets I play
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I can't say, "What's yer name?
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Care to chat for a bit?
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It's me Brian, that guy,
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From that class, Russian Lit.?
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Care to sit, have a chip
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Care for some fun dip
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Doystoyefsky doesn't impress me
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What do you think of that shit?
|
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But I don't, I just twitch
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And I itch in my pants
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Play my Gameboy Advance™
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Until she's finally walked past
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I mad dash to my crib
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Where I get on my blog
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Insearchofspock.com
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Check it out if you want
|
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That's the steam blowin' scene
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Where I reign supreme
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Webster's my friendster
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I run the message board for Ween
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It's a mental mall for teens
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It's a paradise on earth
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But in a way it's like a curse
|
Faster than a Google search
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I just sit here and drink beer
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While my roommate flirts
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At some party, with some hottie
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Who's all into Fred Durst
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It makes my heart burst
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And yet I do nothing
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Just get on the web and
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Start bitchin and frontin'
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A dot com curmudgeon
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Whose love life is sufferin'
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It's the rope or the oven
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Or the hope I find love in the end.
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(chorus) x2
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(I am lab rat
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That is a sad fact
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Shining my test tubes
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Crying in restrooms
|
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Dorm life blows
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If you've got no place to go
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I call my mother everyday
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And say I wanna go home!)
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-----------------
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Ratz
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| MC Chris |
