I never wanted to be better than my friends
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I just wanted to prove wrong the people in my head
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the ones who told me I'd be better of dead
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the ones who told me that I would never win
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when I delivered newspapers they said I was too slow
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when I was a barista they said I made lousy foam
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when I worked in retail they said I was a slob
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much too dumb for school and much too lazy for a job
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so I rode my bike like lightning
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and I made cappuccinos that would make the angels sing
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took two showers a day and I dressed up like a princess
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shook my fist in my own face and said I'll show you who's the best
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I wrote the kinds of papers teachers hang up on their walls
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I was employee of the month at seven different shopping malls
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and one time playing football I pulled the tendons in my leg
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to prove that I was tough I hopped on one foot
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and finished up the game
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I thought if I succeeded I'd be happy and they'd go away
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but first thing in the morning I'd still wake up and I'd hear them say
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"you're fat, ugly, and stupid, you should really be ashamed
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no one will ever like you you're not good at anything"
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and sometimes I'd rise to the challenge
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but other times I'd feel so bad that I could not get out of bed
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and on the days I stayed in bed I sang and sang and sang
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about how crappy I felt no realizing how many other people would relate
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now people send me emails that say thanks for saying the things they didn't know how to say
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and the people in my head still visit me sometimes
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and they bring all of their friends but I don't mind
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I play my guitar like lightning
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when I sing I like it when you sing too loud and clear
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different voices different tones all sayin' "yeah, we're not alone"
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I got good at feeling bad and that's why I'm still here
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I got good at feeling bad and that's why I'm still here
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I got good at feeling bad and that's why I'm still here
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The Competition
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Kimya Dawson |