Well, your father's in Bermuda
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And the milkman's overjoyed
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Your maid is into bondage
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And I've got Polaroids
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And I was on the corner
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When you wrecked your mother's Porsche
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But why should I inform her
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About your poor misfortune?
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'Cause everyone has secrets
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But sometimes you get caught
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So if it's just between us
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My silence can be bought
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Blackmail . . . blackmail
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I was looking through your closet
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When I found your water bong
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Your stash of Turkish hash
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And a twelve-inch rubber dong
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And I won't tell your family
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About your last abortion
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So you can call it "bribery"
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But I prefer "extortion"
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Well, my counselor is a dealer
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And the football coach is queer
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The school nurse and the dean of boys
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Are having an affair
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And someone shot the rent-a-cop
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And I'm the only witness
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But I won't tell you who it was
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'Cause it's none of your business
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-----------------
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Blackmail
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Sloppy Seconds |