[ INTRO: Chris Rock ]
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...All this ill shit
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This fuckin Sir Mix-A-Lot shit
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What the fuck is this shit?
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See the shit's video?
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'PUT IT ON THE GLASS!'
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'Put yo TITTIES on the glass'
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This is like a pick-up line:
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'How you doin?
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I was wonderin, could you put yo BIG FUCKIN TITTIES on the glass?'
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'No, I don't wanna go to a movie, could you PUT EM ON THE GLASS?!'
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'Put your titties on the glass'?!
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What happened to 'How ya doin? Whatcha doin later? Let's catch a movie'?
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No, 'Put em on the glass'
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'Put em on the fuckin glass'
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What the fuck is this shit?
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The girls got on bikinis - he got a fur coat on
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What the fuck is the weather like in Seattle?
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[ Sir Mix-A-Lot ]
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All my ex's, eat this one
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(You can have her)
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[ VERSE 1 ]
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I used to have this girl, let's say her name was Mona
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Mona, fine young sugar comin out of Arizona
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5 ft. 6 straight thick with a switch
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And a set of them juicy-ass lips (Mmh...)
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Kinky, just like me
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She can take a straight gee
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And put him down for the count 1, 2, 3
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Needless to say I was kickin it
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Cause I know when I'm the only one gettin it
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But - ooh, things change when you don't maintain
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The same game you got her with, mayn
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Flew back home, and I was slippin
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Cause as soon as I left, another brother starts spittin
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Throwin drag about wantin a family
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Tryin to front because he wanna be manly
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Tellin my girl how I'm playin the field
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Boy, you'se a jake for real
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Now a player I like, but you know I can't stand no snitch
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Tryin to front like he rich
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Done shot your credit, cause you bought you a new E
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320, and you wanna be a hoe like me
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Now you done salted my game
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Told my girl I'm a player, and you bought her a ring
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You paid a lotta money just to grab her
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I'ma tell you like this, trick: you can have her
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(You can have her)
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[ VERSE 2 ]
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I gotta do what I gotta do
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Baby girl's through, so I need somethin new
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You can't keep a good mack down
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I get around cause I got a tight thing up in Sea-Town
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5'9" with dimples
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Caramel skin, straight fine, hella tight, no pimples
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Thinkin my game was concrete
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But I gotta watch for them other entertainers and athletes
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Especially the ones who wanna settle down
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Cause they'll beg and drink out your shoes and get they nose brown
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Just the kinda man you wanted, ain't it, honey?
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A big buff dumb-ass fool with hella money
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Down to spend till his knees bend
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Then the athlete's broke and his girl's in the wind
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And my girl gets mad, cause I never spend time like I'm s'posed to
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Plus I'm a boaster
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Shaggin up too damn quick, now she's lookin for a sugar daddy
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Just to get a '96 Caddy
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A big truck she found
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You young scrub on the bench for the Cleveland Browns
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He never had nothin, thicker than a cheerleader
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Now he got juice, so he eats her
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And treats her to a big wad of cash
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Two weeks and she left his ass
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You can have her
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(You can have her)
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Just rollin by the Playboy Mansion...
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[ VERSE 3 ]
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I got me a, I got me a, I got me a, I got me a
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Young bunny, young bunny in La-La Land
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Wanna get freaky with the papa man
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I smack her to the front, I smack her to the back
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I smack it with the whiffle ball bat, remember that?
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One happy black man I be
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When my L.A. bunny wanna trip with me
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Her name is Teresa
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She was freakier than me, but I figured I could please her
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She had the long braids
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Chocolate sister, loved to cuff men like slaves
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Arrived at the house at last
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Seen two shades of lipstick on the same wine glass
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Provocative artwork around me
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Four pink slippers on the floor surround me
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One pair's for her, the other pair's for who?
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Plus she only lives in a one bedroom
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Well hm - it might be on
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Menage-a-trois, open la bouche, taste la bomb
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Teresa's roommate walks in
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6 ft 2 with a wig and a stupid-ass grin
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(Oh my goodness!)
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(You can have her)
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You done brought a big-ass man up in the room?
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Girl, what's wrong with you?
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Honey, that is gay
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Yo partner, you can have her
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Cause I don't want none of y'all
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3's Company, if you know what I'm sayin
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Yeah
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Put it on the danceflo'
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Bring it back
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-----------------
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You Can Hav |