This is to the (uh-uh) intertwined souls
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the hands I've been trying to hold
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This is to the (uh-uh) love that I lost
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and all the troubling thoughts of how I got double-crossed
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and this is to the (uh-uh) divorce I was forced to settle with
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and the remorse I fought off with metal fists
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and this is to the (uh-uh) wet, watery kiss I left you with
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on your porch as I watched your trembling lips
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This is to the... memory of our early years
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the first girl I shared feelings with
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and it's the realest thing I'd experienced in my short existence
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and I ain't afraid to admit
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cause love is one of the things that doesnt come with an age limit
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now does it? In fact I'ma have to say I'm more keen to feel such things
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hopeless things I'd lost in a smokescreen of meaningless fucking
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Touching without touching, candles in the dark
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casting shadows on our parents battles, this is for the romantics at heart
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It wasn't long before I held you more then my pen
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when I wasn't writing songs, it was something like
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"Forever and always, whenever those songs play..."
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I remember empty hallways
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or your image that descended from the top floor became an echo
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I paid the price for those hard things, and couldn't afford to let go
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From a passive debt, I'm past regret
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Did you know I dreamt about you before we met?
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Remembering our first kiss, and it ain't even happened yet
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Recollecting your set, and I wasn't even given the chance to forget
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I guess that's the magic of it
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Now every rehashed subject's displaying what I wrote
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on cafe napkins to the public
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to get it over and done with, closure hath cometh
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My shoulders are plummeted from holding these buckets
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Hold your laughs till I go back to the tunnels of Paris
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where I wrote half of these paragraphs... but fuck it
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This is to my ten year story, in another decade
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you better be better prepared for me
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in the first four years, you were all ears
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then for the next six, you left me for the next exit
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with depth to my message
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So that began my affair with the world abroad
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Behind the curtain with the other hurtful girls I explored
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Until I became the monster, turning to the words that I record
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Part of me, if you heard it all before
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"I didn't shake you to hurt you"
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when you landed on the floor
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In a room of naked virtues
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I closed my eyes to cancel what I saw
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Your hand made the first move to the handle of the drawer
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where the frail girl couldn't think to live
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"I didn't shake you to hurt you"
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I never planned it before
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I can't shake off your perfume, can't wash my hands no more
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and I'm breaking my curfew, but I can't walk
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I'm standing at the door, I hear the wailing of a little kid
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...and the failure of innocence
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His compromise eyeing the side of the kitchen sink
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What'you think, I just let you cut you, cut me-- cut the bullshit
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Damn, I love the hugs enough to tolerate
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the way we made each other crazy, making it so tough to operate
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Productively, my self esteem didn't help when I felt ugly
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and I figured that's the reason why you wouldn't trust me
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My ego does bleed, I shouldn't have let you test it
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and let your arms free to follow up with your domestic slip up
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Love is a battlefield so lick your shots quick
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while I lick my wounds and then resume as an obvious target
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Infatuations with the past protect my Purple Heart with
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a faded picture I had in my shirt pocket
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I'm going out with a bang..
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in a blaze of glory holes, the anti-hero
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I don't care how many ways the story's told
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Be careful when these doolies play like drums
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and be careful what you say, because my uzi weighs a tongue..
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This is to the sleepless evenings that I spent next to grave stones
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Hoping someone from beyond would grab my arm and take me home
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I hadn't accepted I'd have to make it alone
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after feeding everything I had into a payphone
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and this is to the rain..
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I felt like it was made of spit
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My parade was an unbreakable chain of Gabe's trumpets
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Save the buckets even though they weighed down my walking
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You don't know the height of the steak you place your fork in
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| You look old (that's what you said) |
