(in parentheses are lines where the live version on the Boxhead Ensemble disc differs)
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sweet ill health has hidden from me,
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events about which one has no memory.
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whether it is to protect or deny
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one is not told and one asks not why.
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the noise near the trees gathers into a block.
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one drinks just to where one is able to talk.
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tries to confuse things that surely occurred, (tries to accuse things that really weren't there)
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by stretching and acting like one hasn't heard. (by shrugging and acting like one doesn't care)
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blank indiscretion and testing of lines
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at the end of a farm there to kick it.
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to find a young dog, swollen and bald (to find a dead dog swollen and bald)
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and to giggle and poke it and stick it.
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to sit in the drive and pull a head down,
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or to push in the way of an oncoming blow.
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to take wine on holidays when no-one's in town
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to dislike someone and let them so know.
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let it burn out this morning at home. (well, I let it burn out this morning at home)
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the stove and the kitchen; the howl and the steam.
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and lay on the couch sometimes resting alone
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in order to utter a decorative scream
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discussed and disgust, and a pretense of light.
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persistent denial, waylaid in the night.
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ignoring the stupid and hating the silence
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disliking the prurient, disdaining the violence.
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denying the rice and accepting the drink.
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however it comes at the start of a fall.
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take it whenever you get it; you think
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you're unlucky ever to get it all.
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you're rude to the relatives; cold to the friends
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unpleasant to god when he comes by the house
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one tries to look cross (?) as the storm it begins
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and goes to the inlet to see things out
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Black Dissimulation
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| Will Oldham |
