It started as a child
|
when I first sought to flirt with fate
|
I¡¯d lay next to the tracks with arms outstretched across the rails
|
daydreaming fantasizing of sparks and screeching brakes
|
the plumes of bright red gushing iridescent in the sun
|
|
adopt a life of struggle
|
one down three more to go
|
desire: amputation
|
leave me writhing in the limbless throes
|
|
it is deficiency I crave
|
I want so to be helpless
|
to inferiority a slave
|
a clump of breathing flesh
|
free from extremity
|
now replete with nothing left
|
|
disassemble me
|
limb from limb oh what a treat
|
no more feeling incomplete nor encumbered by this lie
|
my prayer is for calamity
|
merciful blades to sever me
|
crippling
|
detruncating
|
immobile by design
|
|
majestic ancient titan
|
swims proudly in its tank
|
I wish to slake its hunger
|
flailing my legs as bait
|
|
¡°I finally feel complete. I am now whole.¡±
|
|
superfluous gesture
|
an unnecessary art
|
sacrificial offering
|
unto the gilded saw
|
rid me of my shame
|
of what I¡¯ve overachieved
|
my envy is the handicapped
|
lord I beg of you I plead
|
I plead
|
|
wheelchairs prosthetics crutches
|
all stimulus to me
|
my love beyond mere fetish
|
call it disabling
|
I¡¯d waltz upon a landmine
|
feed digits to machines
|
phantom limb masturbation
|
the only way
|
|
dissemble me
|
limb from limb oh what a treat
|
no more feeling incomplete nor encumbered by this lie
|
my prayer is for calamity
|
merciful blades to sever me
|
crippling
|
detruncating
|
immobile by design
|
|
disassemble me
|
piece by piece a loving feat
|
body image incomplete corrected by a knife
|
my hope is for catastrophe
|
a gangrenous limbdectomy
|
dismantling
|
dismembering
|
cut down to perfect size
|
|
-----------------
|
Phantom Limb Masturbation
|
The Black Dahlia Murder |