I'll tell you a story, believe me it's true
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A tale you'd best hope never happens to you
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Old spicy mcHaggis, how he met his fate
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You I can save, but for him it's too late
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Spicy was big, burly and strong
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His pipes were gigantic, and so was his schlong
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From city to city running around
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Always looking for chicks over four hundred pounds
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One night at the pub a girl caught his eye
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Big as a house Just the right size
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The broad was enormous stacked to the hilt
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Spicy soon noticed a bulge in his kilt
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The piper delivered his best pick-up line
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Thought to himself "This beast is all mine"
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The portly young lady could stand for no more
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Grabbed his cojones and went for the door
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They got to her house and dimmed all the lights
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Spicy was in for one hell of a night
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he said that he loved her, he'd always be true
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"But Mr. McHaggis, I've only just met you!"
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By now he saw double through his drunken eyes
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Neither had looks or appropriate size he came to his sense
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And thought to himself, "At this time of night I won't find nothing else"
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He took off his shirt, she lifted her skirt
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They pulled out his unit and stared to play
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She asked for a glove, he gave her a shove
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Had baby McHaggis nine months to-the-day
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Spicy! Spicy! Spicy! Spicy!
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Spicy! Spicy! Spicy! Spicy!
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One night at the pub a girl caught his eye
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Big as a house Just the right size
|
The broad was enormous stacked to the hilt
|
Spicy soon noticed a bulge in his kilt
|
The piper delivered his best pick-up line
|
Thought to himself "The beast is all mine"
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The portly young lady could stand for no more
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Grabbed his cojones and went for the door
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Three packs a day
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He'll smoke 'til he dies
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Spicy McHaggis
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One hell of a guy!
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"I don't know what you all are talking about
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And who drank all my beer?"
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-----------------
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The Spicy McHaggis Jig
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| Dropkick Murphys |
