(Get down)
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I was cruisin down the avenue early one Friday
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When I saw what I thought was a lady walkin my way
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I turned my back to mama can I blast
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And I said hmm excuse me and she walked past
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She was about five foot six or maybe six and a half
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With a body like a goddess, man, this girl was bad!
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Tight leather pants that fit like a drum
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And two big - yeah well, she had some
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Anyway from behind she was fine
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But when she turned around, her mustache was bigger than mine
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At first I laughed, cause yo, to me that was funny
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But the laughter ceased when she said hey honey
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At first I was confused, I was somewhat spell-bound
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My mouth wide open and my chin on the ground
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And then it hit me, like a bolt from the sky
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I thought: hold up - wait - this girl is a guy
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I tried to get away, I said, Well, never mind
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Maybe I'll see you some other time
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But then he grabbed me by my arm and told me I couldn't leave
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And said, Hey boy, you look mighty cute in them jeans
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This had to be the most embarrassing thing in the world
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My whole neighbourhood was watching me get beat up by a girl
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And when my homeboys came, they didn't let me explain
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They said prince, you're a sucker, you should be ashamed
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My pride was busted right along with my eye
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Cause my homeboys didn't realize that this girl was a guy
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And in retrospect I had to laugh
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I can't believe I didn't notice that this girlie had a mustache
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(get down)
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I remember last year, the day was October 5th
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And my family went away on a weekend ski trip
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And they left $100 and a note by the phone
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That said don't have any company till we get home
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No company I'm 18 They must be jokin!
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And by 10 my crib was smokin
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All of my friends with their hands in the air
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Screaming (party over here party over there)
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The party was jammin till at least about 5
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And as my friends were leaving, they were like Homes, it was live
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I thought the party was over, but really was just beginning
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I turned around I thought I was dreamin, I saw four women
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Dressed in red leather, tight to their booties
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I gestured with my index finger come here, cuties
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I tried to be chill, I didn't wanna scare em
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I said Hi my name's the Prince they said Hi Prince, wheres your harem
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I didn't waste time, I started shooting the gift
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I said Y'all the type of girls I'd like to spend some time with
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I walked upstair, my adrenaline pumpin
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Till one hit me in the head with a lamp or somethin
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The next thing I remember is wakin up nearly dead
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With another Fred Flintstone lump on my head
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Of course I was mad, this type of thing can burn at you
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They tied me up and they were stealin my furniture
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I said Yo sweetheart, what's wrong with you
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What kind of stuff is this for a nice girl like you to do?"
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She turned around and smiled and laughed
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And that's the way that I noticed that the girlie had a mustache
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Not four girls, four guys
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They were in disguise it was a set up all the time
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I made a complete fool of myself that day
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My parents were pullin up just as the u-haul truck was pullin away
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They walked in, looked like they seen a ghost
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There I was, gagged and bound and tied to the bed post
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My pop walked in and asked a brilliant question
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Son, where's the furniture and why is your room so messy
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Obviously Sherlock Holmes had been arrived
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I said What do you think, dad, maybe we were robbed
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I'm tied up, nothing's in one piece
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Let's discuss the facts later, mom, please call the police
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I wanted to have a party, I thought I was clever
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My pop told me I was on punishment forever!
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And in retrospect I had to laugh
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I can't believe I didn't notice that the girlie had a mustache
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(get down)
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-----------------
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The Girlie Had a Mustache
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| Will Smith |
