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SPOKEN:
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[C] I was takin' a trip out to L.A.
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[F] Toolin' along in my Chevrolet
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[G7] Tokin' on a number and diggin' on the radi-[C] o ...
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[C] Just as I crossed the Mississippi line
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[F] I heard that highway start to whine
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[G7] And I knew that left rear tire was about to [C] go.
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Well, the spare was flat and I got uptight
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'Cause there wasn't a fillin' station in sight
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So I just limped on down the shoulder on the rim
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I went as far as I could and when I stopped the car
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It was right in front of this little bar
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Kind of redneck lookin' joint, called the Dew Drop Inn.
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Well, I stuffed my hair up under my hat
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And told the bartender that I had a flat
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And would he be kind enough to give me change for a one
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There was one thing I was sure proud to see
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There wasn't a soul in the place, 'cept for him and me
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And he just looked disgusted and pointed toward the telephone.
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I called up the station down the road a ways
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And he said he wasn't very busy today
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And he could have somebody there in just 'bout ten minutes or so
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He said now you just stay right where you're at
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And I didn't bother tellin' the durn fool
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I sure as hell didn't have anyplace else to go.
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I just ordered up a beer and sat down at the bar
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When some guy walked in and said; "Who owns this car?
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With the peace sign, the mag wheels and four on the floor?"
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Well, he looked at me and I damn near died
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And I decided that I'd just wait outside
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So I layed a dollar on the bar and headed for the door.
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Just when I thought I'd get outta there with my skin
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These five big dudes come strollin' in
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With this one old drunk chick and some fella with green teeth
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And I was almost to the door when the biggest one
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Said; "You tip your hat to this lady, son."
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And when I did all that hair fell out from underneath.
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Now the last thing I wanted was to get into a fight
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In Jackson, Mississippi on a Saturday night
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'Specially when there was three of them and only one of me
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They all started laughin' and I felt kinda sick
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And I knew I'd better think of somethin' pretty quick
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So I just reached out and kicked old green-teeth right in the knee.
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He let out a yell that'd curl your hair
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But before he could move, I grabbed me a chair
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And said; "Watch him folks, 'cause he's a thouroughly dangerous man."
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"Well, you may not know it, but this man's a spy
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He's an undercover agent for the FBI
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And he's been sent down here to infiltrate the Ku Klux Klan."
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He was still bent over, holdin' on to his knee
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But everyone else was lookin' and listenin' to me
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And I layed it on thicker and heavier as I went
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I said; "Would you beleive this man has gone as far
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As tearin' Wallace stickers off the bumpers of cars
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And he voted for George McGovern for president."
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"He's a friend of them long-haired, hippie type, pinko fags
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I betcha he's even got a Commie flag
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Tacked up on the wall, inside of his garage
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He's a snake in the grass, I tell ya guys
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He may look dumb, but that's just a disguise
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He's a mastermind in the ways of espionage."
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They all started lookin' real suspicious at him
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And he jumped up an' said; "Now, just wait a minute, Jim
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You know he's lyin' I've been livin' here all of my life."
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"I'm a faithfull follower of Brother John Birch
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And I belong to the Antioch Baptist Church
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And I ain't even got a garage, you can call home and ask my wife."
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Then he started sayin' somethin' 'bout the way I was dressed
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But I didn't wait around to hear the rest
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I was too busy movin' and hopin' I didn't run outta luck
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And when I hit the ground, I was makin' tracks
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And they were just takin' my car down off the jacks
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So I threw the man a twenty an' jumped in an' fired that mother up.
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Mario Andretti woulda sure been proud
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Of the way I was movin' when I passed that crowd
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Comin' out the door and headin' toward me in a trot
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And I guess I should-a gone ahead and run
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But somehow I couldn't resist the fun
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Of chasin' them all just once around the parkin' lot.
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Well, they're headin' for their car, but I hit the gas
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And spun around and headed them off at the pass
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I was slingin' gravel and puttin' a ton of dust in the air
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Ha Ha, well, I had 'em all out there steppin' and fetchin'
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Like their heads were on fire and their asses was catchin'
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But I figured I oughta go ahead an split before the cops got there.
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When I hit the road I was really wheelin'
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Had gravel flyin' and rubber squeelin'
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And I didn't slow down 'til I was almost to Arkansas
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Well, I think I'm gonna re-route my trip
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I wonder if anybody'd think I'd flipped
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If I went to L.A. - via Omaha.
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Uneasy Rider
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| Charlie Daniels Band |
