Once upon a time me and Vudi met
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A major American rock star in a shop
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We were immediately jealous of his hair
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And his fuel-injected sports cock
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He made the usual stupid sexual jokes
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About the way he comes on top
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But I could tell it was a lie
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By the way that he walked
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How did you pass the Presiden'ts Test
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Even if I can't match your ability to compete
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At least give me a chance to cheat
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He said, "Are you losers making fun
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Of our serious vocation?
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You just gotta bring the music to the people man
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And then go score a hole in one."
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The pleasures of a treadmill and the factory
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Took all the innocence from his eyes
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Leaving him to spurt unashamed
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By the size of his dull suprise
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How did you pass the Presiden'ts Test
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I never felt honest telling those virutous lies
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And my toupee always gets into my eyes
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How do you pass the President's Test
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I don't even want to know my score
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I don't know who's telling me the truth anymore
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I said, "The only thing that we're good for
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Is being forgotten."
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And I know you're big enough of a star
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To make sure that the job gets done
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How do you pass the President's Test
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I swear one day they'll build a monument
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To the man with the most reasons for his embarassment
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How do you pass the President's Test
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No I don't even want to know my score
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I don't know who's telling me the truth anymore
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-----------------
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The President's Test for Physical Fitness
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| American Music Club |
