I was waitin' in Rosie's Restaurant.
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When the waiter came up and said "what do you want?"
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I looked at the menu and it looked so nice.
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Till he said, "let me give you some advice"
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He said, "Spaghetti and potatoes got too much starch,
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Pork chops and sausage are bad for your heart.
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There's hormones in chicken and beef and veal.
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A bowl of ravioli is a dead man's meal.
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Bread got preservatives, there's nitrites in ham.
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Artificial coloring in jellies and jam.
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Stay away from donuts, run away from pie.
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Pepperoni pizza is a sure way to die.
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Sugar rots your teeth, makes you put on weight.
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Artificial sweetner's got cyclamates.
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Eggs got cholesterol, there's fat in cheese.
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Coffee ruins your kidneys and so does tea.
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Fish got mercury, red meat is poison.
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Salt's gonna send your blood presure risin'
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Hot dogs and bologna got deadly red dyes.
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Vegetables and fruit are sprayed with pesticides.
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So I said, "what can I eat that's gonna make me last?"
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He said, "a small drink of water in a sterilized glass"
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Then he stopped and he thought for a minute.
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He said "Never mind the water---There's carcinogenics in it"
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So I got up from the table and walked out in the street.
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Reliazing there was nothin' I could eat.
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I ain't eaten for a month and I'm feeling fine...
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"Cause he did not mention, beer, whiskey, women
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and sweet red wine.
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Rosie's Restaurant
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| Bobby Bare |
