Four-and-twenty virgins come down from Inverness,
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And when the Ball was over, there were four-and-twenty less,
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Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall,
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If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all..
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There was doin' in the parlor, there was doin' on the stones,
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But ya couldn't a hear the music for the wheezin' and the groans,
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Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall,
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If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all.
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The undertaker, he was there, all wrapped up in a shroud,
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Swingin' from the chandelier, and peein' on the crowd,
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Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall,
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If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all.
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The village cripple, he was there, ah he could not do much,
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So he lined the ladies against the wall, and he did 'em with his crutch,
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Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall,
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If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all.
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Miss Mary McPherson was standin' way up front,
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Some posies in her hand, and a carrot in her cunt,
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Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall,
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If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all.
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The Village postman, he was there, but the poor man had the pox,
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He could not do the lassies, so he did the letter box,
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Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall,
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If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all.
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The Village Magician, he was there, he gave us all a laugh,
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He pulled his foreskin over his head, and he vanished up his ass,
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Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall,
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If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all.
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The Ball of Kerrymuir
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| Jim Croce |
