[Verse 1]
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You can check my blackness, fact is
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I'm rough as a cactus
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Now I gotta change what I practice
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So I went to the suburbs and bought me a big house
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And now they wanna run a brother out?
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I'm a well-educated young maker of revenue
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Rollin' in a big black BMW
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So I'm supposed to fit because I'm straight legit
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But the police STILL wanna trip
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They accuse me of robbin' myself
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Never seen a brother with wealth
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Hell, I thought I was big, and now I'm trapped in the house
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'Cause the cops got my crib staked out
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The police chief is runnin' for comissioner
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But if I get outta this, chief, I'm gettin' ya
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Cheif needs a cover-up plan 'cause he heard I'm famous
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Called a crazy white boy, name was Amos
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I thought Amos was a burglar
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But when he saw me, he said I never heard of ya
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He couldn't tell north from south
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But Amos was my only way out
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of this suburbian nightmare
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Huh
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Yeah
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My suburbian nightmare
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[Verse 2]
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I may not look like Beaver, but you don't either
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I bought a big house for the breather
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Even in the suburbs, cops are my enemy
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And all the rich liberals ain't friendly
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So Amos got a shotgun and I got a skillet
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Anything movin', I'ma straight up kill it
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I'm a black man on the come-up, I got done up
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And roughed up by a cop tryin' to get hooked up
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I got a meal and I just sealed two more deals
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And now I'm runnin' from the cops? This ain't real!
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You see, the cops sent Amos in to play that role,
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Be a burglar and rob my home?
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They offered him a deal and then took it back
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Ol' Amos should have signed them a contract
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Cheif walks in talkin' that +nigga+ smack
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*punch* "oof!" "+nigga, take+ that!"
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Now they want me for attempted murder
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The craziest case that a brother ever heard of
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The neighborhood fears me, they're scared to get near me
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The cops wanna smear me
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My suburbian nightmare
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Suburbian nightmare
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[Verse 3]
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I used to eat pig feet, now I'm eatin' lobster
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Gettin' my check, boy, the hell with them propers
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Life still ain't changed 'cause I gotta get my hustle on
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Just to get these cops gone
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Four or five mil' can't make my race change
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It can make the pace change, but it won't maintain
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I can't go outside to jog
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'Cause my next-door neighbor got a prejudiced dog
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But it's America, home of the free
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Life in the 'burbs ain't nothin' like TV
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Now I'm runnin' from the cop clan
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'Cause my neighborhood told the cops: "It was a black man"
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Mr. and Mrs. Gilman next door
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Puffin' on a joint, kinky to the core
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And that's the typical role model
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White picket fence, big house and a bottle
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Who can I blame for the stereotypical mix-up?
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The innocent again get tricked up
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Things is supposed to change when you grow to my size
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Open your eyes to my suburbian nightmare
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[black woman laughing]
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Huh!
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My suburbian nightmare
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[black woman laughing]
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My suburbian nightmare
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[black woman laughing]
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Suburbian Nightmare
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| Sir Mix-A-Lot |
