My mind's a kaleidoscope, it thinks too fast
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Blurs all the colors 'til I can't see past
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The last mistake, the choice I made
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Staring in the mirror with myself to blame
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Sometimes I'm afraid of the thoughts inside
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Nowhere to hide inside my mind
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I'm scared that you'll compare and I'll look a lifetime past repair
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I second guess myself to death, I re-solicit every step
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What if my words are meaningless? What if my heart's misleading this?
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I try to capture every moment as it comes to me
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Bottle up the memories and let them keep me company
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When the hope of morning starts to fade in me
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I don't dare let darkness have its way with me
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And the hope of morning makes me worth the fight
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I will not be giving in tonight
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When I'm old and grey, or thirty, or whatever happens first,
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I'll need you to reassure me I didn't waste a verse
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Or worse, what if my life's work is reduced to just myself
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Like never let you get a word in, while I dissect my mental health
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Or lack thereof, whatever, there's too many things to track
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I really can't remember if I'm insane or insomniac
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Now days, all the kids want crazy, wanna diagnose themselves
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Trade up made up epidemics, pass around prescription pills
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But my disorder can't be cured by a bottle, blade, or dose
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Self-disgust and selfishness tend to hold me awfully close
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But I don't wanna let you see that, I don't want my friends to know
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Self-disgust and selfishness take me everywhere I go
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When the hope of morning starts to fade in me
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I don't dare let darkness have its way with me
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And the hope of morning makes me worth the fight
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I will not be giving in tonight
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Try as I might to keep it together
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Why is recovery taking forever
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Fool the whole world, just until I get better
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I'm terrified I'll be faking forever
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On and on I wonder what went wrong inside my head
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I don't have to have the answers, but tonight I wish I did
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All the pain I can't explain away won't fade
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All the the secrets silenced by the shame
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Don't make me say it [x7]
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When the hope of morning starts to fade in me
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I don't dare let darkness have its way with me
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And the hope of morning makes me worth the fight
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I will not be giving in tonight
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Hope Of Morning
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