JACK
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Listen, there were objects so peculiar
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They were not to be believed
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All around, things to tantalize my brain
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It's a world unlike anything I've ever seen
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And as hard as I try
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I can't seem to describe
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Like a most improbable dream
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But you must believe when I tell you this
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It's as real as my skull and it does exist
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Here, let me show you
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This is a thing called a present
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The whole thing starts with a box
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DEVIL
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A box?
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is it steel?
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WEREWOLF
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Are there locks?
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HARLEOUIN DEMON
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Is it filled with a pox?
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DEVIL, WEREWOLF, HARLEQUIN DEMON
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A pox
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How delightful, a pox
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JACK
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If you please
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Just a box with bright-colored paper
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And the whole thing's topped with a bow
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WITCHES
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A bow?
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But why?
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How ugly
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What's in it?
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What's in it?
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JACK
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That's the point of the thing, not to know
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CLOWN
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It's a bat
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Will it bend?
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CREATURE UNDER THE STAIRS
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It's a rat
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Will it break?
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UNDERSEA GAL
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Perhaps it s the head that I found in the lake
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JACK
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Listen now, you don't understand
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That's not the point of Christmas land
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Now, pay attention
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Now we pick up an oversized sock
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And hang it like this on the wall
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MR. HYDE
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Oh, yes! Does it still have a foot?
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MEDIUM MR. HYDE
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Let me see, let me look
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SMALL MR. HYDE
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Is it rotted and covered with gook?
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JACK
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Hmm, let me explain
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There's no foot inside, but there's candy
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Or sometimes it's filled with small toys
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MUMMY AND WINGED DEMON
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Small toys
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WINGED DEMON
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Do they bite?
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MUMMY
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Do they snap?
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WINGED DEMON
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Or explode in a sack?
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CORPSE KID
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Or perhaps they just spring out
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And scare girls and boys
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MAYOR
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What a splendid idea
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This Christmas sounds fun
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Why, I fully endorse it
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Let's try it at once
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JACK
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Everyone, please now, not so fast
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There's something here that you don't quite grasp
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Well, I may as well give them what they want
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And the best, I must confess, I have saved for the last
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For the ruler of this Christmas land
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Is a fearsome king with a deep mighty voice
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Least that's what I've come to understand
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And I've also heard it told
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That he's something to behold
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Like a lobster, huge and red
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And sets out to slay with his rain gear on
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Carting bulging sacks with his big great arms
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That is, so I've heard it said
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And on a dark, cold night
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Under full moonlight
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He flies into a fog
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Like a vulture in the sky
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And they call him Sandy Claws
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Well, at least they're excited
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Though they don't understand
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That special kind of feeling in Christmas land
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Oh, well...
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-----------------
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Town Meeting Song
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| Danny Elfman & The Citizens of Halloween |
