Hair by mail
|
Tit jobs for teens
|
Go broke appearing rich
|
Searching for rosebud in the fire
|
|
Pop stars fingers in the fans
|
The therapist you wish you had
|
Crucifix or lubricant
|
Government by fad!
|
|
CHORUS
|
Mate! Spawn! and Die!
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Mate! Spawn! and Die!
|
My my my my...
|
|
Are those salmon upstream turning red
|
From shear embarassment
|
Came all this way up all them ladders
|
Without checking a map
|
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My the farce be with you
|
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In one corner of the ring
|
That cherished myth
|
Falling in love magically solves
|
Every problem you've ever had
|
|
In the other corner
|
Spooon size shredded dreams
|
The Gods must be crazy
|
The movie goers must be crazy
|
|
CHORUS
|
|
Wrong worm, hooked again
|
Mounted on the wall in my own den
|
I'll talk alone to a firefly
|
Dial 1-900-Suk-Me-Dry
|
|
You can't throw me to the lions
|
I'm Charlton Heston!
|
You can't throw me to the lions
|
I'm Charlton Heston!
|
|
CHORUS
|
|
Yippe ti-yi-yi-yo
|
Ho ho ho ho
|
Whaat do you really want for Christmas, children?
|
|
"...Mmmmm...
|
Nice place ya got here, darlin'
|
Sure wish the hot water worked
|
Gotta rinse my jizz off before mornin'
|
Or I'll itch for a week-"
|
|
Rarp!
|
Damn! that water's cold
|
Agh!
|
Eeee!
|
|
Steven Tyler
|
Of all people once said
|
"If men bled
|
Would tampons be free?"
|
|
Omi'god, I gottag get goin'
|
"Now?"
|
I forgot to feed the cat
|
|
-----------------
|
Mate Spawn And Die
|
| Lard |
