I'm walking down in the basement
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I'm leaning on the washing machine
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I'm reaching back through a hole in the wall's insulation
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I'm pulling out a bottle of vodka
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Replacing that with a pint of Jim Bean
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I'm lying down on the floor until I feel better
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It's morning and I pour myself coffee
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I drink it til the kitchen stops shaking
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I'm backing out of the driveway
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And into creation
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And the loving spirit that follows me
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Watching helplessly, will always forgive me
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Oh, I want to die alone
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With my sympathy beside me
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I want to bring down all those demons who drank with me
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feasting gleefully
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On my desperation
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I hide all the bottles in places
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They find and confront me with pain in their eyes
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And I promise that I'll make some changes
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But reaching back it occurs to me
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There will always be some kind of crisis for me
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Oh, I want to die alone
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With my sympathy beside me
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I want to bring back all those moments they stole from me
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In my reverie
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Darkening days end
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Oh, I want to die alone
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With my memories inside me
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I want to live that life
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When I could say people had faith in me
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I still see that guy in my memory
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Oh, I want to die alone
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With my sympathy beside me
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I want to bring down all those people who drank with me
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Watching happily
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My humiliation
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-----------------
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Table For One
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| Liz Phair |
