Kyle: It's hard to be a Jew on Christmas.
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My friends wont let me join in any games.
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And I cant sing Christmas songs
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Or decorate a Christmas tree
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Or leave water out for Rudolph
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`Cause there's something wrong with me.
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My people don't believe in Jesus Christ's divinity.
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I'm a Jew,
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A lonely Jew
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On Christmas.
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Hanukkah is nice but why is it
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That Santa passes over my house every year?
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And instead of eating ham I have to eat kosher latkes
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Instead of Silent Night I'm singing
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Hoo Hact Toh Gaveesh
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And what the fuck is up with lighting all these
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Fucking candles please?
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I'm a Jew,
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A lonely Jew
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I can't be merry
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`Cause I'm Hebrew
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On Christmas.
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Celebrity Guest: Hey little boy I couldn't help but hear
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Your feeling left out of Christmas cheer
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And I've come to say that you shouldn't be sad
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This is the one month you should be glad
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`Cause its nice to be a Jew on Christmas.
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You don't have to deal with the season at all.
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You don't have to be on your best behavior or give to charity.
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You don't have to have to go to grandma's house with your alcoholic family.
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Kyle: And I don't have to sit on some fake Santa's lap
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And have him breath is stinky breath on me.
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Celebrity Guest: That's right, your a Jew!
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Kyle: A styling Jew!
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Together: Its a good time to be Hebrew,
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On Christmas...
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Celebrity Guest: On Christmas.
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The Lonely Jew On Christmas
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| TV Theme Songs |
