I'm kinda desperate.
|
You might have sensed it
|
From the tone of my voice.
|
It's a disaster.
|
I got no answers.
|
I'm kinda left with no choice.
|
|
I'm doing lotsa nothings
|
Here with a lot of no ones,
|
Praying for the phone.
|
This solitude is creepy.
|
It really is unpretty,
|
A grown man alone.
|
|
We could meet for coffee,
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Or go to the fair.
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I don't even like to do those things,
|
But I'm gettin' kinda desperate here.
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Just call me!
|
|
[chorus:]
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Box 27605
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Please leave a message while there's still time
|
Bold type print in the classified
|
Single white male seeks Mrs. Right.
|
|
I'm self-employed.
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I'm not usually annoyed by any personality flaws.
|
I'm not a stalker. Excessive talker.
|
It doesn't really matter to me.
|
Whatever you're into, I'm into, that's cool.
|
|
We could meet for coffee,
|
Or stay at home and watch Cheers.
|
I don't even like to do those things,
|
But I'm gettin' kinda desperate here.
|
So call me!
|
|
[chorus]
|
|
I'm not getting any younger here.
|
Please call the number.
|
Anything you wanna do is fine with me.
|
Single white male seeks Mrs. Right.
|
|
Still, my box is empty,
|
And no one sent me any kind of reply.
|
I sit here waiting, never dating, masturbating.
|
Man, I hope I don't go blind.
|
|
We could meet for coffee,
|
Or go to the state fair.
|
I don't even like to do those things,
|
But I'm gettin' kinda desperate here.
|
Just call me!
|
|
[chorus 2x]
|
|
Call me!
|
|
-----------------
|
S.W.M.
|
| The Vandals |
