[Too $hort]
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Ladies, listen up - this song is for you.
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You know it's hard out there to find a dude,
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But The Lonely Island's got three top-notch brothers.
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So sit back and listen while they compliment each other.
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[Andy]
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My man 'Kiv is the shit.
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Dude is thoughtful as fuck, plus his body is ripped.
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He's a good listener even when he's exhausted,
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And he's crazy hygienic, always brushing and flossing.
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But that ain't nothing compared to my main man Jorm',
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The most sensitive, caring dude I've ever known.
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He's got that sweet smile, he's got that slow touch.
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What's the sweet smell? Oh shit, he cooked you brunch!
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[Jorma]
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But hold up, my man Andy's got us both beat!
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He makes a skinny margarita that's a wonderful treat.
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Plus caramel eyes that are hella disarming.
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He ain't no fucking Prince - my man is King Charming.
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[Andy]
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Jor' you're far to kind, and speaking of kindness,
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My man 'Kiv's been diagnosed with colorblindness.
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He loves all people, plus he's got the fat dick;
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It's like a gold prick, all shiny and thick.
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[Too $hort]
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When they pitched me this song, they were kinda vague.
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But I said "fuck it, I'm in" cause they said I'd get paid.
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One thing's for sure, these dudes are weird motherfuckers.
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So sit back and listen, watch 'em compliment each other.
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[Akiva]
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My man Jorm' fucks all night.
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Call him Super Mario, cause he be laying the pipe.
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He got the eye contact like only you in the room.
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A modern-thinking man, he ain't afraid of a broom.
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[Jorma]
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Yo, you talking feminism? Andy loves that shit.
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Plus the femme fatales love him cause he's got good dick.
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And he's a giver: donates hella money to charity.
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He's also got a great sense of humooooooor - that's personality.
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[Andy]
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I hate to interrupt, but I gotta interject.
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'Kiv grinds his own espresso, has his own panini press.
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[Jorm]
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'Kiv! So loyal when he makes his pack,
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That he'll only think of you when he's jacking his dick.
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[All]
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He's a shoulder to cry on when you're down in the dumps.
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He's an outfit to try on when you need a slam dunk.
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He's an extra stirring hand when you're making a soup.
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Take a ride in his coupe, he makes you wanna shoop.
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[Too $hort]
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I'm starting to suspect that these dudes are gay.
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It's none of my business, they just born this way.
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I mean, how many times you gon' mention your homie's dick
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But still try to act like this song is for chicks?
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So ladies be warned before you hop under the covers,
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They might be fucking you but they'll be thinking 'bout each other.
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The compliments, bitch!
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-----------------
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The Compliments
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The Lonely Island |